There are different types of love in your life, all present in different types of relationships. There is the love you have for your parents and family, love that you feel or are going to feel for your children, and there is also the love that you feel for your spouse or partner.
Another kind of love is the type that you feel for your friends. We often have very close relationships with our friends, but we also experience pain in some friendships if things go wrong. Keep your friends close to you, but remember to keep boundaries in your individual lives.
There are many people out there enjoying healthy, close relationships with their friends. These friends have fun together, call each other for support, help each other when needed but also learn when to call it a day.
Other friends are younger, and perhaps they support each other, but they go home to families and still rely on parents for the important things. Whatever the case, friendships and other close relationships are important to our mental health. If you don’t think so, try going a few years without any friends and see how it feels.
Close relationships can go bad when one person in the friendship requires more than the other person can give. This means one friend leans harder than the other, and when the second friend cannot fill the unrealistic needs of the first, things get heated.
Some friends end up wanting more out of a friendship than the other person can possibly give. An example may be friends that live near each other and spend a lot of time together. Inevitably, one may move for the betterment of their life and their family. This is natural and happens. A friend who is too dependent on another may have a breakdown when the other friend moves.
It’s okay to miss those you are in close relationships with, but you cannot expect them to put you above their family and personal needs. If they need to move to buy a house, or move closer to a new job, that should not be a problem. If it is, these close relationships have gotten too close, at least for one of the friends. A friend should not be asked to give up their personal lives and drop everything every time the other has a crisis either. Good friends can be there for each other, but some have dramas every day. No friend can keep up with that.
Close relationships are important, but remember that there may come a time when you have to end one. If someone seems too dependent on you, you may have to back off or tell them that you need some space. It is never easy to say that to a friend. However, a good friend will understand and may even realize they have been leaning too hard on you.
Close relationships should be beneficial to both parties, not just one, in order to thrive and grow into the future.